Tuesday, February 24, 2015

For the record

(alternate post title "Truthful Tuesday")

I, your humble host have never:

  • Been in the Army
  • Been in the Navy
  • Been in the Air Force
  • Been in the Marines
  • Been in the Special Forces
  • Been in combat in any capacity whatsoever
  • Thought it would be neat to lie and brag about any of the above
  • Considered the possibilities of career enhancement by lying about any of the above
  • Tried to impress members of the opposite sex by lying about any of the above
  • Lied about any of the above in any way

Y'know, just in case the powers that be need a replacement for Lyin' Williams, or Bill O'Lieree, or that putz in charge of the VA, or any of the other rich serial "misrememberers" out there -- call me.

8 comments:

  1. I stand w/ you. (Or near you. Especially since we think alike, but you seem to wake up earlier.)

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    Replies
    1. Nice! The splintery broomstick is an excellent touch.

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  2. So, do you actually brew beer? I am now unable to believe ANYTHING that people say on the internoodles....

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    Replies
    1. Yes, I do -- but all this is making me wonder if you might not actually be a zombie...

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    2. ZRM IS MAN OF MYSTERY....MYSTERY AND MUSIC.

      MYSTERY, MUSIC, AND AN AMAZING LEVEL OF FOUL-MOUTHED POLITICAL COMMENTARY.

      MYSTERY, MUSIC, AN AMAZING LEVEL OF FOUL-MOUTHED... I'll come in again....

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    3. Nobody expects the Spanish Inquizombie!

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  3. I have been on the front lines in the fight for my right to paaaarty.

    I have crawled through the pub district while dead soldiers fell all around me, mostly from friendly fire.

    I was there for the carnage that was the Battle of the Network Stars.

    And I still have shrapnel in my backside from glass ornament from fighting the war on Christmas.

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    Replies
    1. I, too, am a veteran of the War On Christmas. I documented the atrocities that occurred at The Battle Of The School Concert a couple years back. The horror, the horror!

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By commenting here you're legally bound to buy me lots of yummy beer.